What is your genius?

Today during a professional development session about learning iWork, the facilitator asked us "What is your genius?"

He wanted to know what we are really good at beside teaching our subject matter.  What are we really passionate about?

I was really shocked that so few people in the room had an answer.

Maybe they were ashamed to admit their online porn addiction, or their WOW game play, or maybe they are really unsure.

It was reassuring and kind of saddening all at the same time.

I don't know my genius, but I figured that I was alone in this.

He made us create a slideshow using iPhoto with about 10 slides.  Mine ended up consisting of randomness.

• A basket: I have a lot of random knowledge about random things - I once was at a trivia night with my mother and other lawyers and was able to answer many law questions better than them.  My mom still says that I am really smart (sometimes even lets it slip that she thinks I am the smartest of my four siblings.)
• The logo for How It's Made - I love that show and learning how things work and how they are put together.
• A beautiful natural woman: Hair care - I love learning about how to care for natural hair.  I am looking forward to growing mine back out so I can play more with it.
• A piece of food: Nutrition - I can tell you about what to eat that is good for you, what you need to eat when you are pregnant, how much and what you should eat if you are trying to lose weight or build muscle.  Unfortunately, I am often too lazy or tired after work to make really nutritious variety... I basically eat the same thing most days.
• A trash can and a recycle symbol: Minimizing my life - Getting rid of something each day has worked this entire month and a half.  I will try and continue through February.  I am also trying to not associate with people who are continuously negative.
• A pen and paper: I love to write.  Even succeeded in completed this NaBloPoMo posting every single day in January.  Not that every post was stellar or award-worthy, but I accomplished that mission and intend to do it again in February.

Maybe one day I will have a true genius.  Then, perhaps it will be easier for me to figure out what I will be when I grow up.

Insane weather, sane spring sports?

It is so beautiful outside - 66 in January in StL.  Who could ask for better weather?

The weather is making me think of spring sports season.

I'm already starting to feel stressed about starting the track season and I still have 27 days until it starts.

We have no track at this time due to construction of a new one, and it will not be finished until about three or four weeks into the season.

I don't have a schedule complete.  Unlike all of the other sports at the school that I know of, the AD does not make the schedule with other ADs.  I have to make calls and email coaches and ADs to find out about meets and then coordinate them.  Since we have no track, all meets are away and we can't do the basic stuff at the start of the season that I would normally do.

I am normally all about the track season and would have already been doing preseason conditioning with the kiddos.  I have the backbones of a schedule and have not done preseason stuff.

And I am not really bothered by that.

I have enjoyed my time without it.  Just like I enjoyed not doing summer track this past summer.  Thirteen years of coaching school and summer each year is starting to wear on me.  The summer was a good break.

I know that to some people, I am known for coaching.

This is somewhat saddening.  I don't love it as much as some people seem to think that I do.

I know I am fairly good at it, but it is not something I am obsessed with like some people I have worked with in the summer time and that I have seen at other schools.

I called the first meeting with my assistant coaches for tomorrow and have a meeting with interested kids on Thursday and then the ball will officially be rolling.

I am not really nervous, I almost don't care - as evidenced by my lack of effort to start conditioning up to this point.

At the same time, I don't want to suck at anything that I do.

Hopefully, the great weather is a sign that the weather during the season will be tolerable.

I hope I can make it through the season with my sanity.

How relaxing has evolved

The way I relax has changed over time.

When I was a kid, I loved to just read a book.  Doing so was great.  I could imagine that I was in that the world of the novel, I could let go and just read their story, I could learn about different parts of the world and different time periods in history.  I also played out side or played games or put together puzzles.

In college, I loved to go to parties with my roommates.  It was fun to just relax and dance.  I loved to feel the bass in my bones.  I still find it amazing how music can impact people - how you can really feel it.  When I was competing (track) a lot of relaxation was had just vegging out in front of a tv, or talking with friends or catching up on sleep.

First year out of college and first year teaching, I loved to sit back and watch tv, go to music shows with the guy I was dating, and go to parties and bars.

It was during that time - post collegiate track career - that I started to love running.  I lived in the perfect spot in Columbia, Missouri where I not only had an excellent view of nature, but also had easy access to a trail that was awesome.  I remember how nice it felt to come home from school/work, slip on my sneaks, and hit the road/trail.  I never listen to music when I run for a few reasons.  First, I love to hear nature and my feet hitting the trails, second, I don't want to have some dangerous shit happen to me and not even realize it is coming because I am busy listening to a song in my earbuds.  

I was still in great shape, though it was changing since I wasn't competing, but it was still awesome.  My mind could roam, I could see animals, and I was relaxed.

When I moved back to St. Louis, relaxing became more about television and internet.  And I got into a relationship that was time consuming in a good way.  We watched movies and talked to relax.   I still ran some times, but I still have not been in as great an area as CoMo, and I can't stand running inside or on a track.

I find that now, relaxing to me consists of escaping myself in some way.  This can be by watching tv, by playing around on the internet, watching movies, and sometimes just playing Words With Friends or Unblock Me.  Sometimes it is just a nap.  I love to just drift off for a little while.  Sometimes I actually feel like cleaning house is relaxing - vacuuming, cleaning the kitchen or bathroom, decluttering.  It can even be as simple as a hug from my man.  That is a feeling that can sometimes take my mind off of the daily grind.

Any of these are even better with a glass+ of wine.

They feel good.  

I do want to get back into running, for now my morning yoga is a great way to start the day, but I don't think it has the same effect mentally as getting outside and feeling/hearing the air wiz past my ears as I run.  

Another Stream of Consciousness Sunday post.  Try it out yourself.  There is info if you click the button.

Searching for living space

Searching for a new apartment is getting annoying.  Beginning to wish it was as fun and as exciting as House Hunters.  I just want a decent place with a washer and dryer that is not falling apart as the house I am living in now seems to be doing.  I also don't want to be paying $200+ for heat that doesn't even seem to be heating anything.  I want it to have external windows, unlike the place I saw yesterday.  I don't even mind the price since it will be cheaper than this place with all the additional bills and heat that I am paying for.

Right now, we are having a lot more people than ever before looking at this house.  I am hopeful that it sells - though cautious of the person who would find this place grand.  I just want it to sell.

The sun always rises

The sun finally came out today.

I'm not sure when last I saw it, maybe a week or more.

It is amazing what just some sunlight can do for my psyche.

Of course it is not an immediate change of moods, but even seeing the sun right now, though it will set in about an hour is really uplifting.

Reminds me that good can come after long periods of dark cloudiness in life as well as in nature.

Alternate worlds, alternate endings

When I was a kid, I used to wonder if there was a person somewhere in the world who was doing the exact same things as me at the exact same moments.  Someone living my life in a different town and country - Twilight Zone-like, but not in a creepy way.

Now that I am older, I still wonder if there are people who have the same issues as me, people dealing with the same ups and downs, the same life indecisions, the same medical issues, the same family issues.

There are over 7 billion people in the world, it could be possible, right?

It really amazes me how life happens.  

How there can be someone in the world who is going through some really hard shit at the same time that others are suffering through inconceivable drama.  Even when I am sitting, planning lessons, there are people I know who are dealing with problems I wouldn't even wish on others.  And at the same time, there are people I know who are living the good life with not a care in the world.

It is really something when you think about it.

I am kind of rambling, but there is a lot going on in my life and my immediate loved ones lives that really have me thinking about so many things, and nothing at all at the same time.