On a mission to make that money

I guess that people think that the more annoying they are the more you will give in to them. Not only am I having to listen to the annoying interruptions of my NPR shows on the radio, but also something even worse at school.

I don't know who thought of this idea, but the Key Club is trying to raise money. Not sure for what. Their technique is going to really kill me.

They are playing a song each day on repeat before school, between classes, after school, and I think they are going to try and find a way to do it during lunch as well. They will continue this process until their monetary goal is reached.

What lovely song did they introduce this morning as the #20 (I think) song on Vh1's Greatest Hits of the 90s? What song is stuck in my head even as I type this? What song is going to lead me to choke every kid that just walks by the people standing in the hall trying to collect money without donating anything? What song is going to lead me to do like the corporations do on NPR and match whatever is donated just so that this all is over quicker?

None other than "MMMBop". "Yea-aa yea-aa. Can you tell me who will still ca-aa-aarree?"

I guess this stuff works. I always give money to the station to get them to shut up and get back to my regular programming. And I am going to bring cash to school to help this song end.

I think that I am going to embark on a similar plan at the school until the superintendent and the school board raise either my personal pay or the salary scale to meet my desires.

I have a few options I am pondering:

• Pass out liberal propaganda to all the students and wear liberal t-shirts and jeans with holes everyday.
• Reserve the most expensive hotels for the State track meet (one suite for each student-athlete) and any other conferences I attend.
• Constantly play the scene from the Fugees album when Praz is in the Chinese restaurant and the guy tells him "Like Burger King, have it your way" and jumps the counter. Over the projector speakers in my classroom. All day. Every day. Well, I might mix in some of the songs, too, since I still love that album.
• Call in sick every other day and not leave any sub plans for the substitute teacher.
• Come to school with my Sigg bottle filled with something quite a bit stronger than water and get progressively drunk as the day progresses.

Not sure which one will lead to more money for me.

I'll think about it.