I've been pretty good with it.
Today, I deliberately decided to go back to my old ways of complaining to see what it would be like now.
I complained to colleagues, I complained to students, I complained to myself.
It wasn't the most complaining I have done in my life, but it was a good amount in comparison to the limited complaining of the past weeks.
I wanted to see what it felt like.
- Complaining did not make me feel better in any of the situations.
- Complaining did not ease any of the situations I was complaining about.
- Complaining did make others laugh and share some of their complaints - bonding, I guess.
Was it worth it?
It was quite draining and I felt awkward.
I guess if I want to entertain people and bond through shared misery, I can continue to complain a lot.
Otherwise, I can continue to make changes to things I complain about and to help others see things more positively. I can bond through happier things and through trying to find solutions rather than gripe about the problems.
Today, I was talking with a friend who is going through some difficulties with her pregnancy. I complained for a bit about some things to her, but then felt really horrible about her situation. I acknowledged her pains, and then tried to make suggestions that she had not thought of yet. I also reassured her that each day she makes it through, she is closer to being able to hold her suffering over her soon-to-be daughter's head when the daughter is older.
Helping her and cheering her up made me feel better than all the complaints I shared today.