05 January 2012

Worry less and feel good anyway?

I saw someone post this either on FB or Twitter and thought it was brilliant.

Only issue is that I need to better heed the advice.

Worry less:
I am going to try to live by this idea.

Smile more:
When I am not smiling, I tend to have a really serious look on my face.  There are students and grown-folks who tell me that I need to smile more.  I have started to smile more even when I don't feel like it.  I try to always greet people with a smile.  Even when I walk down the halls at work or walk down the street or walk down aisles in stores and come across a person, I smile at them.  Often, I get a smile back.  Other times, I am ignored, other times, I get a strange look - I guess some people are not used to seeing a friendly face.
I still feel that I have times when I am worrying about something that I am not smiling at people.  I need to worry less so that I can smile more.

Accept criticism:
When people I care about criticize me, I get defensive and close up a bit to what is being said.  I guess that I really want to be accepted by people I care about and don't want for them to be seeing the negative sides of me.
In becoming defensive, I sometimes miss what they are saying or don't want to admit that I am in the wrong.  I make excuses for my actions - sometimes ones that don't really make sense.
I heard a quote (sorry I can't remember who it was from) that I try to repeat that summarizes what I need to do with this part of the poster
We receive great value from being open to feedback without becoming defensive.
So true.  I am already getting better with this, and am already taking steps to address some of the issues that have been brought to my attention.
If I can accept criticism, I will be able to smile more during these conversations with loved ones and worry less about how I come across since I will be working to better the aspects of me being criticized.

Take responsibility:
I need to do more of this.
I take responsibility for my failures to act.  I take responsibility for my mistreatment of people.  I take responsibility for my life being the way it is.

A motto I recite each morning is "Be better than you were yesterday."

Listen & love:
I love to love.
I love to listen.
With all this technology in my hands, though, I find that sometimes I am distracted as I listen to people and don't hear everything being said.  I am sure that I have missed out on some great things people have said IRL, on the telly, and even things I have skimmed over while reading because I was multitasking --unsuccessfully.
I need to be more responsible and be more present with people and with everything that I am doing.

Don't hate:
I don't really have too much of an issue with this one.  I don't hate people.  I understand that some people are reflections of their environment.
I hate their environment.  I hate their upbringing.
The older I get, the more I hate the systems that contribute to the way the society is set up.  I hate that there are still racist ideas spewing out of people (regularly in comments on sites).  I hate that politicians refuse to really address the racist comments that they have said.  I hate that people are not willing to be respectful to the President and his family, even if they do not share his political opinions.  I hate that politicians are not willing to work to better society mainly because they want to disagree with the administration.  I hate how the economy is working right now.  I hate that even in athletics there are discrepancies between how races are seen and how they participate.  I hate that we have to make light of the fact that people say things about the other (or their own) races.
I could go on and on with things I hate.
I try not to worry about many of them, but they are in my face daily.

Embrace change:
I know that I want a lot of things in my life to change.
I sometimes do not act because I am afraid of failure or what might be out there if I don't succeed.
I need to not worry so much, listen to people's support, and be more willing to embrace change.

Feel good anyway:
This one is simple, yet hard for me.
But I will try.


  1. I like this...especially "smile more"...it not only brightens up your face, but also your day and everyone around you. Sounds like all good stuff. :)

  2. I like your list, especially about accepting criticism. The criticism quote is brilliant!

  3. You have taken on some pretty big challenges. I don't think any of these are easy. But I think, the smile is what will light the way and I think you are doing tremendous. I am worry-wart myself and it's a tough nut to crack!

  4. Another quote I say in my head a lot is "Smile, it confuses people".

  5. @ Caroline - I love the criticism one, but that is one of the harder ones to do.

  6. This is a good list. Like others, accepting criticism is a difficult one for me. To buffer it I have to add "consider the source".

  7. @ Sabrina - I definitely need to focus on the source of various criticism. That helps keep it in perspective.

  8. Feel good anyway...hard to do, but important to one's mental well being...I enjoyed your post... :D

  9. @ Cath - Thanks, sometimes it is hard, but that's life. Although I can't always look on the bright side, I at least try to look on the side that is semi-lit with a candle that is only slightly hidden. LOL!


I share my thoughts and would love to read your thoughts, too.