05 January 2012

Worry less and feel good anyway?


I saw someone post this either on FB or Twitter and thought it was brilliant.

Only issue is that I need to better heed the advice.

Worry less:
I am going to try to live by this idea.

Smile more:
When I am not smiling, I tend to have a really serious look on my face.  There are students and grown-folks who tell me that I need to smile more.  I have started to smile more even when I don't feel like it.  I try to always greet people with a smile.  Even when I walk down the halls at work or walk down the street or walk down aisles in stores and come across a person, I smile at them.  Often, I get a smile back.  Other times, I am ignored, other times, I get a strange look - I guess some people are not used to seeing a friendly face.
I still feel that I have times when I am worrying about something that I am not smiling at people.  I need to worry less so that I can smile more.

Accept criticism:
When people I care about criticize me, I get defensive and close up a bit to what is being said.  I guess that I really want to be accepted by people I care about and don't want for them to be seeing the negative sides of me.
In becoming defensive, I sometimes miss what they are saying or don't want to admit that I am in the wrong.  I make excuses for my actions - sometimes ones that don't really make sense.
I heard a quote (sorry I can't remember who it was from) that I try to repeat that summarizes what I need to do with this part of the poster
We receive great value from being open to feedback without becoming defensive.
So true.  I am already getting better with this, and am already taking steps to address some of the issues that have been brought to my attention.
If I can accept criticism, I will be able to smile more during these conversations with loved ones and worry less about how I come across since I will be working to better the aspects of me being criticized.

Take responsibility:
I need to do more of this.
I take responsibility for my failures to act.  I take responsibility for my mistreatment of people.  I take responsibility for my life being the way it is.

A motto I recite each morning is "Be better than you were yesterday."


Listen & love:
I love to love.
I love to listen.
With all this technology in my hands, though, I find that sometimes I am distracted as I listen to people and don't hear everything being said.  I am sure that I have missed out on some great things people have said IRL, on the telly, and even things I have skimmed over while reading because I was multitasking --unsuccessfully.
I need to be more responsible and be more present with people and with everything that I am doing.


Don't hate:
I don't really have too much of an issue with this one.  I don't hate people.  I understand that some people are reflections of their environment.
I hate their environment.  I hate their upbringing.
The older I get, the more I hate the systems that contribute to the way the society is set up.  I hate that there are still racist ideas spewing out of people (regularly in comments on sites).  I hate that politicians refuse to really address the racist comments that they have said.  I hate that people are not willing to be respectful to the President and his family, even if they do not share his political opinions.  I hate that politicians are not willing to work to better society mainly because they want to disagree with the administration.  I hate how the economy is working right now.  I hate that even in athletics there are discrepancies between how races are seen and how they participate.  I hate that we have to make light of the fact that people say things about the other (or their own) races.
I could go on and on with things I hate.
I try not to worry about many of them, but they are in my face daily.

Embrace change:
I know that I want a lot of things in my life to change.
I sometimes do not act because I am afraid of failure or what might be out there if I don't succeed.
I need to not worry so much, listen to people's support, and be more willing to embrace change.

Feel good anyway:
Seriously.
This one is simple, yet hard for me.
But I will try.

9 comments:

  1. I like this...especially "smile more"...it not only brightens up your face, but also your day and everyone around you. Sounds like all good stuff. :)

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  2. I like your list, especially about accepting criticism. The criticism quote is brilliant!

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  3. You have taken on some pretty big challenges. I don't think any of these are easy. But I think, the smile is what will light the way and I think you are doing tremendous. I am worry-wart myself and it's a tough nut to crack!

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  4. Another quote I say in my head a lot is "Smile, it confuses people".

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  5. @ Caroline - I love the criticism one, but that is one of the harder ones to do.

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  6. This is a good list. Like others, accepting criticism is a difficult one for me. To buffer it I have to add "consider the source".

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  7. @ Sabrina - I definitely need to focus on the source of various criticism. That helps keep it in perspective.

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  8. Feel good anyway...hard to do, but important to one's mental well being...I enjoyed your post... :D

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  9. @ Cath - Thanks, sometimes it is hard, but that's life. Although I can't always look on the bright side, I at least try to look on the side that is semi-lit with a candle that is only slightly hidden. LOL!

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